Turn Goals into Cheers: Soccer Saturday Drinking Game Rules

Every football fan knows that Soccer Saturday is a rollercoaster of emotions. From last-minute screamers to controversial VAR decisions, it’s a show that keeps you glued to the screen. But what if you could take the excitement up a notch? Enter the Soccer Saturday Drinking Game, where every goal, red card, and over-the-top reaction from Jeff Stelling turns into a drinking challenge.

This game has become a weekend staple for football fans looking to add an extra layer of chaos to their Saturday afternoons. Whether you’re watching alone, with mates, or as part of a full-on house party, these rules will make sure things get lively.

Ready to turn goals into shots and pundit banter into beer chugs? Let’s dive in.

How to Play the Soccer Saturday Drinking Game

The Basic Rules

The concept is simple: you drink based on what happens during Soccer Saturday. Here’s a classic set of rules to get started:

• Goal scored – Take a sip of beer.
• Hat-trick completed – Down half a pint.
• Penalty awarded – Take a shot.
• Penalty missed – Take two shots.
• Red card given – Down a full drink.
• Own goal – Everyone drinks.
• When Jeff Stelling shouts “Unbelievable Jeff!” – Take a sip.
• When Chris Kamara is confused about what’s happening – Drink for five seconds.

This is the basic framework, but plenty of variations exist.

Variations & Challenges

Jeff Stelling’s Special Edition

Dedicated to the legendary presenter himself, this version focuses on his reactions:

• If Jeff Stelling loses his mind over a last-minute goal, take a shot.
• If he laughs at a ridiculous miss, drink for five seconds.
• If he incorrectly announces a goal, everyone downs half a pint.

The Extreme Version

For those who think the standard rules are too soft, here’s how to turn things up a notch:

• Every goal = One shot.
• Every VAR check = Drink continuously until a decision is made.
• Every injury = Drink until the player gets back up or is subbed off.
• If a match ends 0-0, finish your drink out of sheer disappointment.

The Pick-a-Team Challenge

Each player picks a random team from a match, and their drinking fate is tied to that team’s performance. If your team:

• Scores a goal – Take a shot.
• Concedes a goal – Take two shots.
• Gets a red card – Down half a pint.
• Wins the match – Everyone else drinks.

This version adds a competitive edge, making you cheer for a team you wouldn’t normally care about.

Wild Soccer Saturday Drinking Game Variations

If the standard Soccer Saturday drinking rules aren’t chaotic enough for you, it’s time to crank up the madness. These variations take the game to a whole new level, ensuring an afternoon of unpredictable, football-fueled mayhem.

1. The Kamara Confusion Challenge

Dedicated to the legendary Chris Kamara, who somehow manages to be present at matches without actually knowing what’s happening.

Rules:

• If Kammy misses a goal – Drink and yell, “I don’t know, Jeff!”
• If Kammy is utterly confused by a red card or penalty – Shot of spirits.
• If Kammy suddenly realizes he’s been wrong the entire time – Down your drink in solidarity.
• If Kammy isn’t featured on the show – Drink in silence to mourn his absence.

2. The VAR Nightmare Edition

VAR is supposed to bring clarity, but it usually just makes things worse. This version makes every check feel even longer.

Rules:

• When a VAR check begins – Everyone drinks continuously until a decision is made.
• If the decision takes longer than 60 seconds – Down half a pint.
• If the referee checks the pitch-side monitor – Everyone does a shot while pretending to stroke their chin thoughtfully.
• If the decision is overturned – The person who celebrated too soon drinks twice.
• If the commentators start debating “clear and obvious error” – Everyone debates whether they should take another shot (they should).

3. The Jeff Stelling Meltdown Mode

We all love Jeff Stelling, but when he loses it over a ridiculous goal or controversial moment, things get wild.

Rules:

• If Jeff’s voice cracks mid-sentence – Take a sip.
• If Jeff yells “UNBELIEVABLE JEFF!” – Everyone does a shot.
• If Jeff gets a score wrong and has to correct himself – Down half your drink.
• If Jeff laughs at a terrible miss – Drink while laughing hysterically.
• If Jeff roasts a pundit for a terrible prediction – The worst predictor in your group takes a punishment drink.

4. The Last-Minute Limbo

For those who love injury-time drama, this version ensures the last few minutes of a match are as stressful as possible.

Rules:

• If a goal is scored after the 85th minute – Everyone downs their drink.
• If the game has 5+ minutes of added time – One shot per extra minute.
• If a team equalizes in stoppage time – The person who supported the winning team takes two shots out of pure heartbreak.
• If a commentator says “it’s not over yet” – Chug for five seconds.

5. The Pundit Nonsense Edition

Football pundits love throwing out clichés and ridiculous takes. Time to hold them accountable.

Rules:

• If a pundit says, “At the end of the day” – Everyone drinks.
• If a pundit claims a goal was “unstoppable” when it clearly wasn’t – Shot of spirits.
• If a pundit calls a game “a tale of two halves” – Half a pint.
• If someone mentions “taking it one game at a time” – Two shots for stating the obvious.
• If Roy Keane goes on an angry rant about passion and commitment – Down your drink in fear.

6. The Zero-Zero Suffering Mode

There’s nothing worse than sitting through 90 minutes of goalless football, but this version ensures at least something happens.

Rules:

• If the game reaches halftime 0-0 – Everyone does a punishment shot.
• If the game ends 0-0 – Last person to finish their drink has to chug another.
• If the first shot on target doesn’t happen until after 30 minutes – Shot for every five minutes of boredom.
• If the commentators try to hype up the game despite no action – Everyone drinks and sarcastically cheers.

7. The Own Goal Chaos Challenge

Own goals are the ultimate football embarrassment. Here’s how to make them even worse.

Rules:

• If a player scores an own goal – The person in your group most recently guilty of a bad decision takes two shots.
• If the own goal is ridiculously bad – Everyone rewatches it and drinks while laughing.
• If the player who scored the own goal looks devastated on camera – Everyone takes a sympathy sip.
• If an own goal happens in stoppage time – Finish your drink and reconsider your life choices.

8. The Multiscreen Madness Mode

For those watching multiple matches at once, this variation ensures maximum drinking chaos.

Rules:

• Every time you forget which match you’re watching – Take a shot.
• If two matches have a goal at the same time – First person to react takes a penalty shot.
• If a commentator switches between matches mid-sentence – Everyone drinks in confusion.
• If the scores get updated in the wrong order and cause chaos – Down your drink in frustration.

9. The Commentary Drinking Bingo

Instead of drinking based on goals or cards, this version makes you drink whenever commentators repeat their classic lines.

Rules:

• “He’s got to do better there” – One shot.
• “That’s a great bit of skill” – Half a pint.
• “The crowd is the 12th man” – Everyone drinks.
• “A striker’s finish” (for any goal) – Last person to notice takes a shot.
• “They’ll be disappointed with that” – Chug in solidarity.

Best Drinks for the Soccer Saturday Drinking Game

Picking the right drinks for your Soccer Saturday Drinking Game can make or break the experience. You want something that keeps the fun going without knocking you out before halftime. Here’s a breakdown of the best drinks for different levels of play, plus some football-inspired cocktails to spice things up.

Best Drinks for the Game

1. Casual Players (Light & Social Drinking)
   • Lager or Pilsner – Easy to sip, perfect for long sessions.
   • Cider – A solid choice if you want variety.
   • Radler/Shandy – Half beer, half lemonade, keeps you in the game longer.
2. Intermediate Players (Stronger but Manageable)
   • IPAs or Craft Beers – More flavor, but higher alcohol content.
   • Rum & Coke – A classic, easy-drinking combo.
   • Gin & Tonic – Refreshing but deceptively strong.
3. Hardcore Players (Brace Yourself)
   • Whiskey or Bourbon – Pairs well with dramatic last-minute winners.
   • Tequila Shots – Dangerous, but necessary for VAR-induced suffering.
   • Jägerbombs – The official drink of regrettable football decisions.

Football-Themed Cocktails

1. The Red Card(For when things get out of hand)
   • 1 shot of vodka
   • 1 shot of cranberry juice
   • A splash of Red Bull
   • Serve in a shot glass and down it whenever there’s a sending-off.
2. The Last-Minute Winner(When you need a comeback drink)
   • 1.5 oz dark rum
   • 1 oz pineapple juice
   • ½ oz lime juice
   • Dash of bitters
   • Shake and serve over ice for a smooth but powerful hit.
3. The Jeff Stelling Special(Inspired by his legendary reactions)
   • 1.5 oz gin
   • 1 oz elderflower liqueur
   • Topped with tonic water
   • Drink whenever Jeff loses his mind on air.
4. The Penalty Shootout(Dangerous but fun)
   • Line up 5 shot glasses with different spirits
   • Flip a coin to decide if you take them or pass them to a friend
   • If you miss a penalty in FIFA or real life, you must take one.

If you want to go all out, set up a mini-bar with a football theme. Stick club logos on the bottles, serve drinks in pint glasses from your favorite team, and name each round after a famous football moment.

The Ultimate Soccer Saturday Drinking Game Setup

If you’re serious about making your Soccer Saturday Drinking Game the best it can be, you’ll need more than just a TV and some beers. Here’s how to set up for maximum fun.

1. The Perfect Viewing Setup

• Multiple Screens – If you want to track multiple matches, get an extra TV or tablet.
• Surround Sound or Speaker System – So you don’t miss any of Jeff Stelling’s legendary meltdowns.
• Comfy Seating – If you’re in it for the long haul, make sure you’re comfortable.

2. The Drink Station

• A Well-Stocked Fridge – Keep beers, mixers, and non-alcoholic options cold and ready.
• A Shot Board – Write out penalties and bonus rules on a chalkboard.
• Pre-mixed Cocktails – Saves time so you can focus on the game.

3. Football-Themed Extras

• Drinking Game Scoreboard – Track who’s winning and who’s already struggling.
• Football Jerseys or Dress Code – Pick a team for the day and wear their kit.
• Matchday Snacks – Have easy-to-eat food like nachos, wings, and crisps.
• Last Leg Football Card Game – Add some competitive fun with a football-themed card game where players try to outsmart each other with tactical plays and win points, just like a real match!

4. Atmosphere Boosters

• Chant Sheet – Print out the funniest football chants and make people sing them as a punishment.
• Goal Celebration Rules – Decide how you celebrate goals (e.g., everyone drinks, do a silly dance).
• Penalty Shot Spinner – A homemade wheel with different drink punishments (shot, chug, pass, etc.).

Setting the scene properly makes the whole experience more immersive and chaotic—in the best way possible.

Soccer Saturday Night: Responsible Drinking & Alternatives

How to Pace Yourself

While this game is a blast, it’s also easy to go overboard. Here are a few tips to keep things under control:

• Stay hydrated – Alternate with water to avoid an early exit.
• Pick your drinks wisely – Mixing too many spirits can lead to regret.
• Know your limits – There’s no shame in bowing out before you end up on a train to a city you don’t remember.

Non-Alcoholic Version

Not everyone wants to drink, and that’s completely fine. Here are some ways to enjoy the game without alcohol:

• Instead of drinking, do a push-up or sit-up for every goal.
• Make it a snack-based game, where you eat something spicy for certain events.
• Use soft drinks, but keep the rules the same for the fun of it.

The Soccer Saturday Drinking Game is the perfect way to inject extra excitement into an already unpredictable football show. Whether you’re in it for the banter, the drinking, or the sheer chaos, this game guarantees an unforgettable Saturday.

If you have your own house rules or wild drinking game stories, share them with us. Just remember—drink responsibly, pace yourself, and always have a backup plan in case you wake up somewhere unexpected.